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  • Writer's pictureKelly


Updated: Feb 26, 2020

When I bought my new Yamaha at the local motorbike store back in September, I couldn’t help but notice the cute biker sales guy that helped me get started up. A shy guy with his sexy leather-clad, dirt-bike, track-racing dark side who was always overly friendly and happy to see me. The -6° weather we’ve been having gave me some great opportunities to pop in to see his cute face when I was getting some heated bike accessories.

My ‘feel-how-cold-my-hands-are-cute-biker-sales-guy’ ruse…

When he offered to wire up my heated jacket free of charge, I thought I’d test the waters and make the first move. I lightly suggested that I buy him a drink as thanks for wiring up my bike. He adamantly refused and said that it was all part of the service (I nearly asked if the service extended to the clients too….). Clearly it didn’t. Rejected, I went home.

Later that evening he messaged and invited me out to the Ace Cafe on Friday night for some live music. I happily accepted, realising that clearly he hadn’t wanted to ask me out in front of his colleagues.

Credit: Kalin Kalpachev

He picked me up and I slid gracefully into the heated seats of his Mazda Rx8 as we sped off, him illuminated by the car’s low blue lights. Conversation was light and easy with the sexy background music making the drive altogether quite sensual. We arrived and were greeted by a group of people that he knew. Great, I thought, he’s popular too.

It turned out that these were his friends he had planned to meet there that evening. It dawned on me that I had evidently misjudged our relationship and he was just a nice guy trying to make new friends. Throughout the evening, his friends and I had friendly chats, friendly conversation and friendly jokes. A mutual friend had even told him about my blog. I was clearly in the friend zone.

On the way home I was a little deflated but had enjoyed the alternative evening with a nice group of people. However, what came next was one of the most confusing conversations of my life:

Biker guy: So how did you enjoy the date? *After a long, confused silence from me Him: Erm… did you not enjoy our date? *a confused and now awkward silence ensued Me (finally): Was it a date? Him (now awkwardly): Well, how did you take it? Me (more awkwardly): How did you mean it? Him: But what did you think it was? *ever more silence Him: Well, I like you Me (confused): But your friends were there so I figured we were just hanging out Him: Do you like me? *Silence whilst I willed us to teleport instantaneously to our destination Me (after it was clear I do not posses teleportation skills): Erm……… yes………………. Him: I’d like to take you out but I don’t want you to write about it as another dreadful date on your blog Me (failing to lighten the tone): Well, you better make sure it’s a good date then…. *Silence the rest of the way home

I didn’t hear from him again. Assuming that I had put him off completely, I let it be.

Until….. New Year’s Eve when I may have called him with my tequila bravado to ask him why he never asked me out. I can’t really recall his answer but I know I rambled on about my mother until I fell into a giant flowerpot. Thankfully that ended the conversation. Here’s hoping that nothing goes wrong with my bike now….

Happy New Year to you all…!!

2 January 2017

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