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  • Writer's pictureKelly

Meeting know-it-all-Neville in Montenegro

Updated: Jan 23, 2020

The Boyfriend and I walked into the hostel kitchen so that I could see what basic goodies were available to prepare a meal for us later on. I'd barely opened a cupboard when a man drinking coffee in the corner pounced and regaled us with a step-by-step account of his travels for the past 4 weeks. He then invited himself out with us to walk around Podgorica town.

Neville is the vegan version of a traveller, ie. he has to tell you within one minute the total number of countries he's visited (93) and that that includes Antarctica. Not that he's counting, of course.

Know-it-all-Neville barely stopped for breath as he raced us pass Independence Square and into the cafe quarters for another coffee - presumably so he had a captive audience. He told us he was just rattling through the Balkans but defensively repeated that in no way did that make him a 'country counter' when I mildly asked why it seemed like he was rushing from place to place.

It could have been a fascinating conversation but it was just so one-sided that I kept drifting off as Know-it-all-Neville listed region after region he had passed through.

I almost tried to interject an opinion when he said that England, Wales and Scotland aren't strictly countries - they're states apparently - but as he then said he'd counted them all the same, I returned to my (silent, people-watching) state.

I personally find it somewhat bemusing when people claim to have 'done' a country just because they spent 3 minutes in the capital city. We are all entitled to travel as we please but when there doesn't seem to be any joy, then I feel like maybe something is missing.

After Neville left (he had a bus to catch to Croatia), we managed to wander slowly through the town and take in our surroundings. We walked around the old ruins near Ribnica Bridge and picked juicy pomegranates from the trees, washing our sticky fingers in the stream after munching the seeds. The Boyfriend and I ended up in a quirky cafe near the Cathedral of the Resurrection of Christ, where we played chess before heading back to the hostel.

I wonder where Neville is now...

Next post (Hiking in the Biogradska Gora National Park, Montenegro)

Previous post (Offending the local gang in Mostar, Bosnia)

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